Hi guys, how are you doing? I hope you guys are well and are drinking a lot of water. Did you catch the last post?
This week, we are talking about weird sexual kinks you didn’t know about; you guys, I must warn you, these might be weird, there are weirder ones, but I had to censor them for the sake of people that will be triggered.
Hold on to your hats, ladies and gentlemen. Minors, please check out at the door; we will see you another time; if you are 18 this week, welcome to the club. Take a seat; someone will attend to you soon.
So what are your weird sexual kinks? Please share some of them with me; I promise not to judge. Well, mine is an attraction to hands. Yes, my lovelies, I am attracted to delicate, well-trimmed fingers. The magic they can do to me.
As you go into this post, you might see your weird sexual kink; keep in mind that kinks are hereditary and that your parents probably have the same weird sexual kinks. Yes, dear, your parents like to get down.
Weird Sexual Kinks You Didn’t know about.
These following weird sexual kinks are actual kinks of people you know; it might be your brother, that nerdy girl in your class, or even your father. Have fun reading them.
- Macrophilia: This weird sexual kink is for the people that get turned on by giant-sized body parts. I know there are big parts, but there are the giant ones, like when watching anime and you see a gigantic penis or humongous breasts, and you get turned on? Congratulations, your kink is macrophilia. But I have a question, how do you manage it if you end up with a regular-sized partner?
- Nylons: Yes, dear, someone out there has a nylon weird sexual kink. They are generally attracted to someone putting on nylons or someone putting nylons on their body. Some even like it when their partners peel nylons off their bodies. Why? I honestly do not know but let us move forward before it gets weirder.
- Pregnancy: I heard something like this on Twitter with picture proof that some people like to have sex with pregnant women, not like she is your spouse o; you will just see a woman that is preggy, and you are aroused. Whew, you are trying. There are websites and porn sites you can watch pregnant people’s porn. Good Lord, what is wrong with people? (I am trying not to judge right now).
- Kleptolagnia: You know how people get a rush of adrenaline when they do what they are not supposed to do, i.e., stealing or having sex in a public place? Some people get aroused by it. Imagine you work in a bank, and the robbers are wasting your time by fucking in the bathroom while you are literally fighting for your life. I feel these people will beat their meat to documentaries of heists.
- Katoptronophilia: This weird sexual kink is for people who love masturbating or having sex in front of mirrors; this one is so hot. Do you know these books where the guy would tell their partner to look into the mirror as they do filthy things to them? Oh God, so hot. I might have something for this, whew. It must be so nice.
- Quirofilia: This is my jurisdiction; this is the hand fetish. I am drawn to fine hands and fingers. Hands are a wild experience for me, and the magic they can perform, Lord help me. This one time, I saw a Tiktok video of a well-oiled hand, and I had flashbacks (flashbacks of what? I don’t know, dear). This kink can be an enjoyable way to explore your sexual life with your partner; you have no idea the extent of what the hand can do. Try today.
- Electrostimulation: Imagine you are torturing someone, and you are using electric shock as an instrument, then you hook it to the person’s nipples, and they moan and tell you to push the current higher. That is what this weird sexual kink sounds like to me. Some people are aroused by electric shock. These people can use toys that give them a gentle jolt or shock to get aroused. You should know to take it easy as a beginner. That reminds me of a video of someone saying, “Vibrator is too much, naked wire is okay,” (It is so much funnier in Yoruba).
- Hobophilia: As the name implies (no, it is not the Yoruba word for Vagina), it is a weird sexual kink about attraction to homeless people. People get aroused when their partners or sexual partners do not have a place to sleep. No place to go? Let’s do it right here on the sidewalk.
- Axillism: There was this thread on Twitter sometime this month where a lady tweeted that some people like to eat the armpit of their partners. This is the name for it. Did you guys ever watch A Million Ways to Die in The West? You will understand what I am saying. Some people like licking other people’s armpits, and some want to make love to people’s armpits. (How do they do it? I do not know, and deep down, I don’t want to know to be honest).
- Hematolagniacs: These are people that drink blood in a sexual context. You know how some of us fantasize about having a vampire suck from our neck in a sexual way, and we start making love? This is it. But these ones actually suck blood. I want to experience this and see what it is all about. What I don’t understand is whether they are drinking my blood or if it is from a blood bank.
- Urophilia: Did you guys see Movie 43, the part where the guy’s fiancée asked him to shit on her? This is just like it but with pee. Some people get aroused when they get peed on; they like it when their partner goes number one on them. This can be linked to humiliation kink; the person being peed on is the submissive one and enjoys the feeling of humiliation as they are being peed on.
- Claustrophilia: Imagine a tight space where you are choking, but others are getting aroused. I don’t understand how they can get turned on because I would scream my head off. I actually would like to meet people with this kink; to understand their thinking when they are turned on because what??
There you have it, the list of weird sexual kinks you didn’t know about; if you want part two of this list, I will compile the filthiest ones and post them next week. Let me know in the comments.
Which weird sexual kink is yours? Do you know anyone with any of these kinks? Go ahead and drop a comment.
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See you next week.